Sports are an important part of every Man's life. They should be taken very seriously. Any heartbreaking loss for a Man's favorite team can completely debilitate him. There are only a few moments when Men are allowed to cry, but this is one of them. Given the proper athletic circumstances, shedding a few tears is not frowned upon and can be an essential part of the healing process, which should last through the offseason.

Watching the game is a crucial bonding experience between Men. They gather together moments before the start of the sporting event, crack open a beer, and find a good seat. The preferred location is at another Man's house, who, unless he's a woman, has a large television, a superior sound system, and plenty of supplies. Sports bars are acceptable also, but still secondary to the inexpensive and more comfortable use of your fellow Man's home.

This is a sacred time in a Man's life, which means women are not in the room (unless they are true fans). Women are obviously welcome to pass through and carry stray dishes with them on their journey. However, questions like "Who is playing?" are not encouraged and should only be answered by the Man associated with said woman. Conversation during gameplay is confined to the topics of the game itself, the nature of that particular season, and certain sideline reporters.

The Mantivity rating of watching the game is high, as it an essential part of any Man's life. The score ranges from 3.0 to 3.3, depending on the room you are watching it in, how many Men are watching with you, and the type of beer you are all drinking. However, significant bonus points can be gained if your favorite team is victorious, particularly if the game is close.

Let's face it, Hockey is a Manly sport. It is played in the cold. A vast majority of its best players have beards. A main feature of the sport is fist fights. Despite all this, however, many hockey players are trying to reduce the Manliness of the sport by passing too much, wearing protective gear on their faces, and taking a lot of pussy-willow finesse shots. This is not what hockey needs.

Slaps shots, the proud technique developed in a Russian laboratory and perfected by Russ Tyler, are the Manliest of goal scoring attempts. If done correctly, they produce a win-win situation: you will either succeed in scoring a goal, or, better yet, you will knock the teeth out of that dumb-ass goalie who didn't wear a mouth guard. This will cause the opposing team to put in their back-up, who is also Taylor Hanson, and therefore very bad at hockey. Because of your Manly heroism, your team is guaranteed a win. Nice work.

A good slap shot receives a 2.7 Mantivity score. It does not matter whether or not it goes in, the fact that you are taking it shows that you are a Man. For this reason, it is recommended that you take slap shots whenever you get the puck. Although your teammates will hate you, you will be more of a Man. (As you will find, part of being truly Manly is being hated by other, less Manly humans.)