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Thursday, March 20, 2008

#8 Watching the Game

Sports are an important part of every Man's life. They should be taken very seriously. Any heartbreaking loss for a Man's favorite team can completely debilitate him. There are only a few moments when Men are allowed to cry, but this is one of them. Given the proper athletic circumstances, shedding a few tears is not frowned upon and can be an essential part of the healing process, which should last through the offseason.

Watching the game is a crucial bonding experience between Men. They gather together moments before the start of the sporting event, crack open a beer, and find a good seat. The preferred location is at another Man's house, who, unless he's a woman, has a large television, a superior sound system, and plenty of supplies. Sports bars are acceptable also, but still secondary to the inexpensive and more comfortable use of your fellow Man's home.

This is a sacred time in a Man's life, which means women are not in the room (unless they are true fans). Women are obviously welcome to pass through and carry stray dishes with them on their journey. However, questions like "Who is playing?" are not encouraged and should only be answered by the Man associated with said woman. Conversation during gameplay is confined to the topics of the game itself, the nature of that particular season, and certain sideline reporters.

The Mantivity rating of watching the game is high, as it an essential part of any Man's life. The score ranges from 3.0 to 3.3, depending on the room you are watching it in, how many Men are watching with you, and the type of beer you are all drinking. However, significant bonus points can be gained if your favorite team is victorious, particularly if the game is close.

2 comments:

Achilles said...

Boone, I do not approve of the clip chosen for "close," at all. Extremely inappropriate. And wrong.

(That is actually a good example of crying after a sporting event. Not saying I did, but I might have.)

Daniel Boone said...

Go green.